Question: What do we have to do to gain our Parents good Duas?
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
حامدًا وّمصليًا وّمسلمًا
In the Name of Allaah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
It is truly commendable that in today’s time where violation of the rights of parents and willfull negligence to ones parents is at its peak, there are still such people who endeavour to attain the Duas of their parents.
Hereunder are the etiquettes if accorded to parents one will acquire their Duas:
- Never be disrespectful to parents. Do not say a harsh word to them
- Even if they are unjust, it is not lawful for children to ill-treat, disobey or displease them
- Obey them in all lawful things. If they instruct you to do anything which is unlawful in the Shari’ah, then politely decline. Never refuse or argue
- When parents scold, one should submit to such treatment with humility. You should never utter a word of disrespect or complaint, nor should you display on your faces any indication of anger or disgust. Bear their treatment with silence and patience.
- Assist them in all lawful ways, even if they are not Muslim
- Whenever you see them, greet them
- If you live with them, take permission before going anywhere. Notify them of your location
- Do not call them by their names. Address them with titles of respect and honour
- Pay the debts of your parents (after their demise and if they are unable to whilst alive)
- When entering the private room of your parents seek permission before entering
- Always be cheerful in their presence. Speak kindly and tenderly to them
- When speaking to them, keep your gaze low. Do not stare them in the face
- Do not raise your voice above the voice of your parents
- When walking with them, walk slightly behind them, not in front of them
- Even in their absence speak highly and respectfully of them
- Do not give preference of your wife over them. (This does not apply to the rights of the wife. Where parents instruct the son to discard or violate the obligatory rights of the wife, it is not permissible to obey them)
- Always endeavour to keep them happy
- When they question you, do not inconvenience them by delaying your reply
- It is highly disrespectful to abstain from answering them.
Ref: Aadaabul Mu’aasharaat, Family ties pg. 18 – 19
And Allaah Ta’ala knows best
5 Jumaadal Ulaa 1437
14 February 2016
Checked and approved by:
[Mufti] Muhammad Irshad Motara
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